Monday, November 9, 2015

Refrigeration Aggravation

So, the old basement fridge packed it in a couple of weeks ago, which is unsurprising for an appliance 2-3 decades old, but still very disappointing. We are far too accustomed to the convenience of a second refrigerator, and not just for beer and defrosting turkeys either; bagged lunches are stored there overnight, bulk foods from Costco stage there briefly before they get repackaged and frozen, and yeah, beer needs a cool habitat to dwell in and I want to do my part.

 

Worst of all though, the termination of the lower deck refrigeration unit means that a sizable collection of stickers is going with it!

 

I got out the razor blade and was able to save about a half-dozen of them, but most of them just weren't strong enough for the transfer protocols. I guess this is how we learn to let go. I mean, if I wanted to keep the stickers, I could have left them on their respective sheets, right? But then they aren't really stickers, and I have a boring fridge, so in the end, I regret nothing. Well, except the death of the fridge.

 

Buying a new fridge seemed excessive to needs, but the idea of scouting out a bunch of old fridges on Kijiji filled me with apprehension, so I ended up going to a used appliance store that warranties their stuff. I found a much newer fridge at what seemed like a reasonable price. They offered to deliver it for a mere $65, but I was intent on maintaining my self-imposed budget, or using the savings to make the fridge less empty once I got it home by stocking it with an assortment of fermented malt beverages, maybe.

 

This turns out to be the worst $65 I never spent.

 

The staff very very helpful in getting the fridge into the Flex, although they cautioned me against starting it right away after transporting it on its side. We also managed to gouge the side fairly well where the tailgate latches, but I wasn't particularly worried about the esthetics of a basement fridge.

 

I got the fridge home and even got it out of the Flex and into the garage singlehandedly. When Audrey got home, I talked her into helping me mule it downstairs. After all, myself and one other person had gotten the old fridge in no problem, right?

 

This took the better part of an hour, nearly wrecked our little handtruck, and took its toll on my marriage as I futilely attempted to explain my rationale for saving nearly two thirds of a C-note. Oh, and it all took place mere feet from where Fenya was hosting a belated 17th birthday sleepover and playing Cards Against Humanity with her friends. Not being able to curse due to avoiding being crushed by a major appliance while being in earshot of this particular game being played by your firstborn is deeply ironic, I assure you; if you're rare unfamiliar with it, please just take my word for it.

 

Then the old fridge had to get hauled out of the basement, which turned out to be even more trying. You see, our little dolly is of the short-handled variety, meaning that in order to use it to move a fridge on a set of stairs,my oh essentially have to be under it. This was difficult enough going downstairs, but damned near impossible going up. During this arduous and tedious process, dragging and pushing an enormous brick-shaped object up an inclined plane, I pictured the Pharaoh standing over us with a whip, and started to hum 'Let My People Go', but was duly informed that this was neither helpful nor entertaining, so I desisted immediately.

 

When we were done, both of us were sweaty, grumpy and sore, with my back sending periodic twinges of pain like the plucking of a harp's E-string in case there was any danger of my forgetting my foolishness, but I have the look on my wife's face for that, so no worries.

 

The old fridge now sits on the patio until I can mule it to the Eco-Station, doors taped shut for safety, but not making me feel any less red-in-the-neck for having a large appliance in my yard. Hopefully we can get it sorted before the snow flies.

 

The new fridge got plugged in Sunday night, very tentatively, even though it had nearly 48 hours to settle, and I am happy to report that it appears to be fully functional. Cleaner, brighter, with much more flexible shelving than the old fridge, there was clearly only one proper way to welcome this new addition to the household...

 

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