Canned Tragedy, or "Whoops..."

The road to hobby hell, it seems, truly is paved with good intentions.

The Space Hulk boardgame was my introduction in 1990 or so to the Warhammer 40,000 universe: board sections to lay out a derelict spaceship (the titular hulk), counter for doors and other details, and most critically, the miniatures: 20 or so alien Genestealers, and 10 Space Marine Terminators in Tactical Dreadnought Armour. Sure, they were primitively sculpted but they fully captured the imagination, and laid the foundation for my first two 40K armies, as well as over a decade of working with the publisher, Games Workshop.

About a year after parting ways with GW in 2007, I picked up a copy of the revamped game (with far cooler figures) from the Kingsway store I had once looked after as manager, then cell manager, and finally regional manager. The box was damaged so the manager kindly discounted it for a former colleague.

I have unpacked the box a few times, long enough to have applied a coat of blue to the 'Stealers and red plus a black wash to the Blood Angel marines, and there is photographic evidence of having played with Totty in 2018 - which may be the only actual game I have played with this set.

The unfinished nature of these models began nagging at me of late, and in truth, I have no earthly idea why. But for whatever reason, I was compelled to dust off the Genestealers recently with the intent of completing them in 1-2 weeks.

With the blue applied to their carapaces, it was really just a question of  painting over the exposed fleshy bits and then coating that with a purply Speed Paint, and finally picking out the claws, teeth, eyes and other details.

Oh, and the bases, which are overwrought and underbalanced but I love them. Speed Paint stood me in good stead once again for things like extensive skull-based inlay or wiring trunks and such.

A couple of weeks of listening to podcasts and Project Hail Mary interviews (as well as the awesome audiobook), and they were all done - not great by any stretch, barely good in places, but completed and table-worthy after nearly two decades! 

Now just to varnish them. I grabbed a full can and headed to the front step, shaking it vigorously.

I was on about my third pass when I realized I was re-priming my models. 

It had been so long since using this particular spray, Roughcoat, that I had completely forgotten that it was a grey primer, not at all like the 'Ardcoat gloss varnish I had confused it with. 

I raced into the house and tossed them into the sink with running water. I soaped up a soft -bristled brush and took that to them as well, but it accomplished very little.

Well, that isn't quite true - the moisture re-activated some of the first-generation Speed Paint I had used, de-tinting many of the heads and hands of my fearsome aliens, as well as leaving fuchsia spots on the counter top that took significant effort to remove. And I suppose some of the fresher primer was washed or rubbed off as well.

Most people I have related this mishap to have been very understanding - a 'there but for the grace of God go I' sort of thing I imagine. And even my initial fury at my own stupidity has relented a bit now, five days later. I mean, at the end of the day, even marred like this, those 'Stealers still look better to me now than they did unpainted.

I am unsure what, if anything, I will do about these models. I may try inking them or touching them up in some fashion, or perhaps I will just play with them as is.  For the time being, they are just going to sit in the box until I finish the Terminators - hopefully completing them within another decade or so. ; )

(Christmas) Village People (and Creatures)

One of the highlights of Christmas decorating in our house is the setup of the girls' Christmas village, hand-painted by their Oma and gifted to them over many Christmases when they were younger. It is a pretty immense setup and Audrey has added a larger display area, some fluffy snow, lampposts and trees.

In addition to setting it up in an aestehtically pleasing way, Fenya and Glory add an intriguing narrative to the arrangement of buildings, with an upper-class and lower-class side, interpersonal intrigue and undertones of corruption and comeuppance. 

One year for fun I dropped in an immense, evil-looking action figure and some zombies, much to the delight of Glory's friend Ally, but this year I started sneaking in one miniature per day from my collection, starting on December 1. No one noticed until the ninth, and since I was not explicitly told to stop, I continued all the way through Christmas. Thankfully my family shares my sense of whimsy and are all great sports.

I shared my progress over six instagram posts during the holidays, but wanted to document them here as well. Please enjoy Advent Incursion 2025!

Old West fiddle player

Old West pugilist

Old West uh...saloon worker

Old West chuckwagon cook

The Mirror of Galadriel (LOTR)

Celeborn of Lorien (LOTR)

Queen Galadriel (LOTR)

Stormtrooper

A yeti tyke (D&D)

Chwinga nature spirit (D&D)

Yeti parent

Reghed Glacier nomad (D&D)

Stor- you know what this is

Snowy owlbear (D&D)

Wolf (D&D but not exclusively)

yes, another one (they look cool in snow)

The White Moose of Lonelywood (D&D)

Duergar King, Xardorok Sunblight (D&D)

Saoirse The Beloved, Warlock (D&D)

Invisible Frodo (LOTR)

Saoirse's familiar, Nivius (D&D)

Algetha Dawnseeker Ogolakanu, Barbarian (D&D)

Goliath werebear Oyaminartok (D&D)

White Dragon (Arena: the Contest)

Split D&Decision

The first Thursday of each month, a group of us play Dungeons & Dragons at Polyrhythm Brewing. A couple weeks back, my four players found themselves in the center of a ring of ghostly frost giant chieftains on their stone thrones, fighting a giant skeleton summoned up by the ancient king, Reggaryarva. 

The fighter, monk, bard and druid squared off against the undead creature, who, though not fast, packed a significant wallop. In fact, a natural 20 took the gnomish druid out on the very first turn (and on that poor player's first opportunity to play in months, to boot).

No idea why I didn't snap a pic of the actual fight...

The remaining adventurers managed to eventually drop the frost giant skeleton, but were then assailed by an invisible stalker, and before too long, all the party members save one were laying unconscious. Worse still, their mummified companion Sahnar had been tragically destroyed by the stalker! 

At least the sole member on his feet was able to stabilize his living comrades and drag them to safety, as the spectral king dismissed his summoned monster with a wave while wiping mirthful tears from his eyes.

The next morning, the debate revolved around whether the Ice Pack (as they are sometimes known) should have another go at the gauntlet, or move on to sooething a little less challenging.

The monk argued that the challenge was proof that something valuable was at stake, if they could just prove their worth. The fighter challenged this, saying they had followed a rumour lacking in details far out on the tundra away from Ten Towns. The druid mused that there might be further challenges after the stalker, while the bard lamented that a rematch would not include Sahnar, one of their heaviest hitters.

As a Dungeon Master, it is great to sit back and watch your players interact in a way that requires little to no input from yourself. I did throw in the occasional tidbit like, "yeah tough to beat an invisible foe without something like faerie fire to even the field," prompting the druid's player to reply, "hmm, I actually have that spell..."

The debate went back and forth, with the monk being most insistent on trying again, since the ghostly council supposedly only appeared under the light of the full moon. The other players were more hesitant, arguing there were other rumours to explore, but also hating the idea of relinquishing potential loot.

Watching the monk player emphatically trying to make his case, I jokingly said, "Roll Persuasion!" He dutifully picked up a d20 and let fly, ended up with an imprssive result of 19.

"That isn't binding, is it?" asked the fighter player.

"No," I confirmed, "Player characters have agency, they get to make up their own minds."

The bard player finished his current beer and said, "Well, I'm convinced."

I blinked. "What? Really?"

"Not totally," he replied. "I, the player, think this is dumb idea that will likely result in some or all of us getting killed." Looking the monk player square in the eye, he continued with a grin. "But Yorrick Grondson, half-orc bard and adventurer, is completely on-board thanks to the effective arguments made by Fardun Glinthammer!"

Grinning, the monk player looked at his teammate running the gnomish druid, Merrick Frostbottom. "Well," he mused, "if we can keep me out of the scrum a bit longer, it could work..."

All eyes turned to the player running Ivar Ango, human bounty hunter, who stared back impassively for a long moment before finally sighing, "well, it's not like I am going to let you idiots do this without me, am I? So I guess I'm in too."

And so the next night, the adventurers set themselves up far more strategically, and when the frost giant skeleton was summoned this time, it was hard pressed to deal with the hit and run attacks of the nimble monk. Ivar darted between the massive stone thrones, forcing the undead thing to clamber over them in pursuit while spells shot forth from Yorrick and Merrick.

With the martial arts attacks of Fardun doing double damage to the brittle bones of the skeleton (and with it not rolling any critical hits this time!), they made short work of the first challenge in surprisingly little time.

And when the invisible stalked first attacked one of them, Merrick illuminated it with faerie fire, negating its primary defense. This allowed the rest of the party to flank it and take it down in again, a surprisingly quick fashion.

This prompted cheers around the table and a respectful nod from the ghost of King Reggaryarva, who raised his hand and...whoa, almost put more spoilers in there than I'd intended... Needless to say, the Ice Pack was elated, and the adventure will continue in early November.

From a coin check earlier in the evening; Sahnar (RIP) at the bottom

G&G XIX: Aliens

Finding the right games for our annual Gaming & Guinness get-together can be a challenge, as most most strategic games (whether board, card or otherwise) tend to support 4-6 players and not the 8 or 9 we typically have in attendance. We have repurposed a lot of miniatures games that are meant to be played one-on-one by splitting the forces up (Starfleet Battles, Warhammer 40K, Legends of the Old West, X-Wing, Battletech etc.), but that doesn't always yield satisfying results.

Three years ago I brought Aliens: Another Glorious Day In The Corps, which supports 8 players out of the gate and 9 if you let someone play the Alien Hive Mind with the expansion. It is a solid game with great miniatures but a bit ponderous and almost puzzle-like at times, which is not always a great fit for an event that has an alcoholic beverage in its very name.

And in truth, the experience we were trying to recapture was from a much earlier, much simpler game from 1989.

Leading Edge Games, known mostly for their Living Steel (sci-fi) and Phoenix Command (modern military) RPGs, had somehow netted the game license for James Cameron's hit movie Aliens and made a dandy little tactical game out of it. 

Tragically, their limited production values, noticeable at the time, had become egregious over the years. The 'board' is printed on glossy but flimsy folded paper, and the counters are stand up pieces of thin card punched out along perforated lines.

They expanded upon this with three sets of 25 mm miniatures for the humans and xenomorphs, which, again, were not bad at all for their time, but leave much to be desired today. Great storage cases though!

The game was simple yet challenging: the titular aliens drop onto the map completely randomly, moving towards the closest target. The nine marines each have 2-3 actions per turn which they have to divide between moving towards the exit and shooting hostile bugs. 

Luck plays a pretty major factor, obviously, but there is room for smart play as well, and the tension of knowing that on any turn, a xeno can drop right on top of Sgt. Apone and take your best flame unit out of the game keeps things wound up pretty tight.

But as much fun as it is, the map is not just flat, it is plain, and a bit small for 8 players to clamber around to boot. I know the game is a favourite of Island Mike, who has played an online Flash version of it many, many times. But how to overcome its overwhelming lack of pizzazz?

BoardGameGeek to the rescue!

I had actually contemplated scratch building a 3D board for the game years ago, but faltered when I wondered what I could use for the machinery and xenological corruption that made up so much of the board. 

More recently I had wondered if anyone had attempted something similar for 3D printing, and sure enough, LV427 Designs (nice!) had posted pics of it on the famed boardgame site.

I quickly directed our fabrication specialist Jeff to the site and set him to work printing the plates we needed. A few days (and spools of filament) later he brought over a box of great looking grey plastic, and I cleared a space in the garage to prime it all.

There was very little in the way to supports to trim, but all of the scenery (save one larger piece) print out as attached to the floor. This made priming and painting a little tricky, especially for the ones close to the walls.

But once all the paint was applied (mostly drybrushing and SpeedPaints), adding the numbers was not too difficult, despite all the recounting I did to make sure they were all in the right places.

Only after I was completed did I realize I had used an optional, larger exit instead of the proper one, and rushed to replace it. Luckily one of the extra pieces Jeff had printed was exactly what I needed, and the numbers got added at G&G, about an hour before playtime...

And once all the miniatures from AGITDC were added and I threw a printed graphic under the stairwell, it all looked pretty marvelous!

We had a pretty sound strategy, some lucky xeno deployments (and only one 'bonus bug' all game!) and a couple of very fortunate Alien Attack rolls. Two Marines ended up incapacitated but were successfully carried to safety by their comrades - no casualties!

The best part though, was watching Mike's face at the beginning when I pulled away the paper map and revealed the 3D board underneath - wish I had gotten a picture.